Alright, I've made a discovery about myself. It wasn't an "aha" moment if you will, just an "hhhhm" moment. The social security gridlock is one of my main stressors right now. No assistance, used up while waiting, no child support, useless mating. So let's face it, life can be a real downer! Especially if you look at it from the ass end of a horse in a parade . Lol, you just got the visual, it's crap right? The day begins in a hurry, we rush around in a hurry, rarely taking time to stroll. Americans are so impatient and we wish days away like there are a million more lined up.
I was having one of those, "I don't wanna get out of bed-be an adult-this is too hard days." It started pouring down raining with a sudden, thunderous clap and lightning. The car wouldn't shift into gear because some idiot hit me 2 years ago...(go back to the beginning of this story if you're wondering why it's still not repaired). My physical therapist Axel decided to push me too hard, I got into my car and cried afterwards. I never let him see me. Get home and walk into a remake of Tornado. My pit-boxer Fanci thinks EVERYTHING is better shredded! Is that my favorite notepad? You know the one sick people prepare for their family in case of emergency? Yep. Flee toward the stairs with frustrated, pain motivated, irritation generated, tears streaming. Make it to my bedroom and the bed is a mess because a certain Fanci and Genji weren't being supervised. That's it! Screaming, yelling, fussing at the world because I can't take another day like this.
Stop. Breathe. Pray. Refocus. Pick up the bedding, clean up the shredding, if I don't they'll keep forgetting. Go and wash your face it's almost time to pick up SwerveKidd from the taco place. Anxiety creeps in and I head back towards my room. My pillows have been fluffed, favorite soothing candle is ablaze. A handful of mini candy bars from Lady lying on the nightstand. A1 appears and pokes his head in, says he'll make the drive. Thankful beyond measure I quietly close my eyes. A4 appears out of nowhere with the final of this epic save. Hands me my favorite pink and gray pajamas; not another place to go today.
I am in my favorite pajamas, there is nothing more that I enjoy. Pole said I have an addiction, one I can't feed anymore. Matching pajamas and fluffy socks are an easy way into my heart. They're like hugs from your lover, kisses from your kids, reminders to slow it down, and regain some control. If you want to create a calmer world? Pajamas are king..well, at least they are fit for this queen.
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